A Hobbit's Helping of 24 Lord of the Rings Memes to Scroll Over Second Breakfast (June 1, 2024)

Jesse Kessenheimer • Writer and Editor

Jun 1, 2024 11:30 AM EDT

Gollum is like the dog that Dad never wanted.

Adopted off the streets like some clingy, hairless Skeletor, he targeted the weakest in the group (Frodo) to capitalize on his overwhelming empathy and incessant need to take care of others. But Sam saw right through it. Even though Frodo begged and begged, 'Can we keep him, can we keep him?' Sam stood firm on his distrust of this feral creature.

But Gollum was not like an adorable street dog, he was more like the rabid raccoon living outside in a hole fostering its mange… and there was nothing that could change Sam's mind about that.

Good ol' Sam.

Although many of us think we could have withstood the persuasions of Gollum's "charms", most of us would likely be just like silly Frodo, trying to tame a wild thing even after it tries to bite our finger off. Moral of the story is to let nature stay wild and leave that rabid critter outside where he belongs, you never know when he'll frame you with crumbs of Lembas bread or try to mislead you into a dangerous spider tunnel.