xbone

Click the image to sign up. If you need some incentive, watch the Beta trailer below:

The future is coming!

Be warned, he uses some well-deserved adult language in this clip. Others are reporting fluid leaking from their consoles. Xbox, stahp.

Xbox Wire has released some early usage stats, and Xbox One users have chalked up an impressive fifty million hours of play time since launch. I tip my hat to you, Xboners. But seriously, take a break once in a while.

And by instincts, I mean "button mashing skills." Look above for the launch trailer for Killer Instinct.

Move over PS4 issues; it's time to get Xboned! Early Xbox One owners are finding that the Xbox Ones are suffering from broken disc drives out of the box. Warning: the sound of the drive is haunting and cringe worthy. Others are finding that their Kinects aren't performing either.

Let's just ignore the fact that they put Xbox Ones in an armored car.

If you need some time off from work to play your new Xbone, Microsoft has provided a perfectly detailed note from your "Entertainment Therapy" MD, letting you off the hook from any obligations for a day...or five.

To whom it may concern,

Due to the Zombie Flu your employee will not be able to fulfill the scheduled commitment he/she has with you. Because of the severity of this condition I'm prescribing a heavy dose of Xbox One. He needs to destroy zombies.

After a thorough examination, I've concluded that the all-in-one entertainment system is the only cure for the aforementioned condition.

This treatment may take anywhere from 1-3 days to work and will require years of accumulating achievements thereafter. If the patient is disrupted with work, I will have to double the prescribed amount of Xbox One.

If used effectively, Xbox One can help relieve the patient's entertainment deprivation and will have an increased state of happiness at all times.

Dead Rising 3 will be available with the Xbox One on November 22nd. Are you getting it?

Xbox Wire announced MIcrosoft's plan for Twitch on the Xbox One, which includes the ability to watch livestreams and earn achievements at launch, but don't expect to stream any of your own gameplay until "the first part of 2014." Maybe Xbone owners can live vicariously through the streams of anyone whose PS4 works?

LEGO Marvel Super Heroes will arrive on current gen consoles this Friday, November 15th, and on November 29th for the PS4, but will miss the Xbox One launch. No word yet on when the title will make it to the Xbone, though Warner Bros assures it's still on the way.